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Dating Articles

A Simple Technique to Keep Your Woman Happy

By Aaron M http://ezinearticles.com/

When I hear stories from men about how their wife or girlfriend is upset at them and they are in the doghouse, and I find out the details, I often think how easily this situation could have been avoided. What men often find bewildering is then, when they try to get out of the doghouse, all their attempts don't help them at all.

Usually this is the standard operating procedure for most men:

1. Get complacent and lazy
2. Start ignoring the girl, stop listening to her and displaying affection, and instead do lazy, complacent things like watch TV or play video games all day
3. Girl gets angry
4. Guy tries to get back in girl's good graces by telling her he loves her and showering her with gifts and compliments
5. The "I love you"s only makes the girl more angrier and the guy is further in the doghouse.

This is wrong, wrong, WRONG behavior. Everything in the above list is completely backwards from the way you should be treating your girl. In fact, it's harmful, because you end up rewarding her for becoming emotional and angry with you.

Here's the proper way to handle your girl instead:

1. Don't get complacent in the relationship, always be on your toes
2. Always be attentive with your girl
3. Surprise her with affection and gifts for no reason at all sometimes, or especially if she deserves it
4. If/when she gets angry at you for no reason, DO NOT give her gifts and affection, do not reward her for acting out
5. Go back to your loving self when she snaps out of it and realizes you won't tolerate her "shit tests"* (see below)

So let's analyze this dynamic and see how it differs from the way MOST guys do things. First, by not getting into a complacent mindset, you are not giving your girl any reason to be upset with you. You reward her with affection and gifts just for being her great self or if she does something especially nice for you. In other words, you reward her for GOOD behavior towards you. Now let's say she acts out and gets angry at you through no fault of your own. By withholding all the good things you've been giving her and not tolerating any outbursts, you show her that her bad behavior will not be accepted. In the case of most guys, they actually TRAIN their women to have outbursts and get emotional with them, because that's the only way they are rewarded and noticed.

A few key notes: Be attentive and affectionate with your girl, but ease up on the "I love you"s. In other words don't say "I love you" too much. That's because when something is done too often, it loses it's meaning. "I love you" is a very POWERFUL phrase and should be used sparingly to display a tremendous surge of feeling and connection. For example, if your girl does something very loving towards you, a graceful and well-timed "I love you" will send her swooning. But remember, the power of this phrase rests in the fact that it is so carefully and preciously delivered.

*- A "shit test" is a test that a woman will throw at you for no other reason than to see whether you are the confident, aggressive guy you seem to be. She might get very emotional or try to make you jealous or anything else that she'll do to try to draw a response. A lot of times women do this without realizing it, because they are hard-wired to do so. The way you handle this test is crucial in the way she relates to you down the line.